i carry with me my bag, weighing five pounds filled to bursting with my pencil case wallet, keys, my pens, ipod, notebooks, cellphone, PDA, packets of forgotten mints, lip balm, makeup, crumpled receipts, table napkin blotted with words like "moon, potato, sky and stars" scribbled on it
i carry with me my worries, hanging by a thread from my littlest finger-- did i forget something? do i have enough money to get me there? what if he forgets me-- worse, hates me? what am i going to do when i get there?
i carry with me a sunlit garden with my tree
i carry with me my great grandmother's scarves
i carry with me summer afternoons with shadows of my cousin's pigeons streaking over the streets, yells and fights, of making up different lives under a tree or perched on the neighbor's wall
i carry with me my friends' laughter
i carry with me knock knock jokes you might find funny.
or maybe not.
i carry with me the answers to your how are you's
i carry with me my star still without a name
i carry with me a sunset at the other side of the world
i carry with me the traffic jams, the miles and distances i've travelled
i carry with me dresses i can't fit into
i carry with me my cat, at turns aloof, needy, smart, clumsy, neurotic-- so much like me
i carry with me my father's name
my mother's reputation
my sisters' popularity
my brother's charm
i carry with me dreams of flight and out-swimming the sharks and walking on water
i carry with me an umbrella for a rainy day
i carry with me a mirror that makes me look too fat and more/less pretty than i think i am depending on the day
i carry with me silences from the conversations between us
i carry with me the good byes that never end
i carry with me my mentor's words
i carry with me walks at midnight by the ocean
i carry with me the warmth of his hand in mine
i carry with me hugs that leaves us with no more questions
i carry with me blank post cards and stamps waiting to be mailed
i carry with me rainy afternoons at the park
i carry with me sidelong glances and whispers of old ladies, "why isn't she still married?"
i carry with me my heart-- broken, mended, aching, rejoicing
i carry with me songs that i don't know i know the words to until i need them
i carry with me sunday sermons heard from a cold wooden pew
i carry with me the sound of my feet pounding on the pavement
i carry all the forgotten names and faces
i carry with me stories of floods and rainbows, the power that kept three men from burning, of surviving shipwrecks and vipers, of a baby in a manger
i carry with me fumbled words to tell them that Jesus loves them and died on the cross for them
i carry with me impromptu dinners and conversations until midnight
i carry with me my grandmother living a block away but i rarely visit
i carry with me my mom's admonitions-- don't show him that i like him too soon, don't drive alone late, cover up my cleavage, drink my vitamins, clean my room
i carry with me two hours of sundays in front of the tv with my dad, with cars roaring over two hundred miles per hour on the hot asphalt
i carry with me our family history
i carry with me my cousin's dead daughter
i carry with me my grandfather's last words
i carry with me all the questions that start with why
i carry with me all the explanations i am entitled to
i carry with me my cynicism
i carry with me my faith
i carry with me frantic prayers
i carry with me my hope
i carry with me this secret that nobody knows
these i carry with me and lay them down at Your feet, my Savior, my Lord.
love this post. :) 
